A Simple Kind Of Life
by Sweet-Tahira
Summary: Wanting everything had never cost so much
1. The Question

Simple Kind of Life

Chapter One: The Question

She had always wanted more… to be liked more, to have more friends, for life to be more exciting. It was just always that way. She never bothered to ask herself why. She never took the time to stop and examine the reasons behind her needs. It had never been something she gave much if any thought about and really why would she? It was just something that had been… something that was apart of who she was. She never wanted normality. She had always wanted things over the top… the extraordinary… to be different but not strange… to stand out from the crowd but not to be ostracized. She always felt this uncontrollable need to be more then what she was inside. To be separate from the rest without being weird and she had never once questioned her feelings… until now.

As she stood on the edge of what seemed like nothing and everything at once that's all she could do. The rain hitting the top of her head, soaking her hair and running down onto her pale cheeks she felt herself at a lost… for the first time ever…

"_I can't give you what you need..."_

His words echoed in her ears and pounded on her heart as relentlessly as the torrential rain around her. Her tears… real tears… not those superficial ones that she shed on an everyday basis when something didn't go her way, or when she got stuck after school on Home Ec duties cutting cabbage all afternoon! This was pain… an ache inside her chest traveling throughout her entire body. It was real… so damn real… and she was confused.

He couldn't give her what she needed… but couldn't he see? Didn't he understand that he had already given her everything that she needed… had made her feel accepted just by being alive… what more could there be?

Why?

Why would he say that? Why would he think that he wasn't enough? She had always wanted this… always wanted someone like him…

Why?

Why did she? Why was she so enamored with the idea of being more then everyone else… having something different…

'_Because deep down you know just how plain you really are!'_

The voice was neither malicious nor friendly… just all knowing… unapologetic truth.

She was plain… and because of that she strived for those things that weren't… made every effort to seek out those tiny things that set her apart… made her more special… more admired… just more.

Contrary to what others around her might think… she was pretty perceptive. Perhaps not as much as Riku but nonetheless she knew… she knew that she wasn't that great… that when it really came down to it… she was just like every other girl…sure maybe her hair was a little shinier… her eyes somewhat brighter than others… but she was no Riku. She wasn't… unique.

Whatever she did wasn't going to change the world. No one would remember her as anything more than a pretty face and she wanted more than that. Perhaps that's why she wanted to be loved by someone who was special; someone who was unique and would leave a mark on the world.

She knew that it was pathetic, to base your importance on the love of someone else… but that's all she had. When it came down to it that's how she found a way to measure up in this world.

So that's what she did… she pushed herself onto the most unique man she knew and found rejection in what she believed would be acceptance. She had used what she had to make herself appealing, always dressing like a lady, speaking softly, smiling brightly…

'_It's not enough! You're not enough!'_

Clasping her hands over her now wet ears she shook her head slightly trying to block out the voice in her head. "It's all I have… It's all I can do." She cried as her legs gave out beneath her and her knees, so smooth and well groomed, hit the mud encased ground.

"Dark!" She screamed out into the gusty night. Her scream mingling with the howling wind, nature seemed to be feeding off of her emotions, reacting to her tears, mocking her pain. "Dark!" She screamed again her voice straining against her body begging for her to stop. It wasn't use to this… it didn't understand the exertion she was exhibiting. Falling slightly forward she balled up her hands into fists for the first time in years with frustration and hit the ground. "I can't… I don't know how… to do this." She whispered.

There she sat, kneeling in the rain, covered in mud staring at her fists wondering what had gone wrong for moments before she felt the hand on her shoulder… the comforting hand on her shoulder that always seemed to know when she was in trouble… when she needed a friend. Looking over her shoulder she felt the broken smile on her lips.

"Daisuke…" She cried and without a second thought she wrapped her arms around his waist and held onto him… crying into his midsection not caring that she was being completely unladylike. It was Daisuke. It was her friend. It was okay.


	2. Just You, Me, and the Rain

A Simple Kind of Life

Chapter Two: Just You, Me and the Rain

He wasn't sure how long they stayed in that position… him attempting to shelter her from the rain as she held onto him… crying into him… over someone else… always someone else.

Daisuke simply kneeled with her, while a war battled inside him. The voice to comfort her fought with the other side of him… the side that said it would have been if not better at least safer to leave her where she was… crying in the rain over Dark. But his feet couldn't move away from her and before he could stop himself his hand was reaching out and coming to rest onto her shoulder making her aware of his presence. And when she looked up into him, her wide tear filled eyes staring at him he realized that he was stuck… imprisoned within the web of Risa Harada.

Would it always be this way? Him loving her while she pined away for someone else; was that his fate… always a breath away from her touch. Touching but never feeling her lips on his… the thought brought about a sudden ache inside his stomach and without warning he wrapped his arms around her bringing her into his embrace. It wasn't a hug of comfort for her but for himself… to keep his body from breaking with the need to tell her everything… to be everything for her.

Swallowing hard he felt her shiver within his embrace and waited for her to move away… to let him know that she was ready to go, instead she moved closer to him and he felt a small victory.

Yes it was selfish of him to want to be near her now… now at a time when her heart was breaking and he knew that… a part of him knew that it was wrong to think about his feelings for her but the other part of him… well that part was trying to ignore the scent of her shampoo that now seemed even stronger when wet.

He loved her… had loved her from the start, would always love her and that would be his curse… and he hated the way he felt… hated how she made him forget his name and all common sense just with a smile or a caring word. He hated that she loved someone else. He hated that Dark had been too much… had become for her everything that she was for him. And now because of Dark here they were… him holding her, her holding him… he hated it. He hated it all because despite it all he was still very much in love with her.

"Damn Dark!" He whispered softly into the rainy night. He felt her shift slightly and wasn't sure if she had heard him or not but she said nothing… her body which once had been shaking with tears was now still. He could feel her steady breathing and wasn't sure if she had drifted off to sleep or not.

He knew that they should get out of the rain… this wasn't the best place to be… they were likely to catch a cold or worst a case of pneumonia but just a moment more… one more moment to be alone with her. This was the closest they had ever been… at least in his own form. Just him and her… the way he always thought that it was meant to be and now he wasn't so sure.

Should it be like this? Was it suppose to feel this way, be this hard?

'_This ain't nothing kid! It gets worst!'_

He heard Dark in the back of his mind and he wished with everything that for just this once he would just go away; just leave the two of them alone. Give him this moment… this one moment of solitude with her.

"Just go away… just leave us alone." He whispered holding her tighter to him. He waited for Dark to respond but was met with silence and the patter of rain around them.

_Just us… just you and me Risa… the way it was always meant to be._

"Niwa-Kun."

Looking up his eyes met Riku's… and he felt a small smile come to his lips. "I found her… I found her Riku." He stated looking back down at the girl in his arms. He had found her… not Dark but him. He had saved her.


	3. Cruel Summer

A Simple Kind of Life

Chapter Three: Cruel Summer

Riku watched Risa from the threshold to her room. Eight days; It had been eight days since that night Daisuke found her in the rain, soaking wet. Eight days since her little sister had been rejected by the only man she had loved. Eight days since she had taken any interest in anything other than staring out her bedroom window. The sun shined brightly through the sheer drapes, which created a drastic contrast to her sister's mood.

She had tried to get Risa to open up to her and talk to her about what happened that night but she had only been met with soft nods of agreement or sorrowful blank stares. It was so uncharacteristic of her sister that it was beginning to scare her. Even yesterday; the last day of school had been a shock to her. The way Risa simply went through the motions as if she were trained; smiling in the right places, accepting hugs from classmates that were leaving for summer and offering the obligatory "call me" or "can't wait to see you again". But her heart wasn't in it.

She hoped that with the fresh start of summer perhaps things would be different. It had to be; they were going away for a week, with a handful of classmates. She tried not to think about Daisuke. It was strange how comforting it was to think about him. She tried not to analyze what this feeling was that was growing slowly and steadily inside herself afraid of what it might mean.

Shaking her head slightly she came back to the present situation at hand. With a heavy sigh she pushed open the bedroom door and poked her head inside. "Risa, hey!" She smiled broadly hoping that her happiness would rub off onto her.

The brunette turned to her older sister with the same solemn eyes; broken eyes. For a moment Riku found that words failed her, so shocked she was by the sight of her younger sister who was so often filled with vitality. She had always found criticism in Risa's way of thinking. The way that she approached the world had always seemed… well off… superficial at best… but perhaps that wasn't the case at all, perhaps Risa had just been pure… untouched by the darkness of the world. She hadn't been tainted by those things that so often bruise and distort our perception life… until now.

Now she was like the rest of them; understanding of disappointment and heartache and Riku found that she felt guilty… guilty for always finding fault where Risa's perception was concerned; guilt for never just appreciating her younger sister's way of thinking. Hell it may not have been perfect but it was all her… and now…well now she didn't know what to think.

"Riku…" She smiled a lazy smile that she had never seen. Her voice traveled across the room like a dark note from the keys of a piano… melodic yet tragic.

"You haven't even started to pack and we leave in a few hours… where are your suitcases?" When Risa didn't reply she shook her head in mock frustration just glad that she had a reason to move. "You know I can't always take care of you… I mean really packing for you… doubling as you so that you can skip home-ec…it's just… well it's just not okay." She remarked grabbing the empty suitcase from the top shelf of a closet not seeing Risa take a stand and walk towards the corner of her bed.

The large bag hit the ground with a heavy thud as it descended from the closet shelf. Exhaling deeply she began to unzip the bright pink suitcase. "Now… what do you normally pack, and I don't mean that stupid junk that you don't really need either!" Placing her hands on her hips she scanned her sister's closet trying to bypass the excessive amount of dresses and skirts that she owned.

"Riku…" Risa called out.

Putting a hand up to halt her speech she shook her head. "Risa, really; do you even own one pair of shorts or jeans?" She questioned beginning to rummage through the neatly hung up clothing.

"But Riku…" Risa tried again.

"You have to own one pair of jeans. Mom bought us each a pair just last week… although you did try to pawn them off on me… like that could happen…"

"Riku I have…" The younger girl began.

"Please don't tell me that you gave them to Goodwill! I'll tell mom!" Riku stated whirling around to see Risa standing at the end of the bed with a duffel bag between her hands. "What's that?"

"I was trying to tell you… I've already packed." Such a simple statement that meant so much.

Riku remained stoic for a moment shocked. In all the years that she had known Risa there had never been a time when she hadn't procrastinated. It was just in her nature to wait till the last minute. Raising one eyebrow skeptically she opened her mouth to say something, found that words failed her and shut it.

Risa continued to smile at her sister's shock but it wasn't real… the smile was simply an involuntary reflex. Years of practice had conditioned her to smile even when she felt there was nothing left to smile about. "We should get going, shouldn't we?" She offered coming to stand in front of her.

Riku nodded. "Yeah… I guess."

Risa nodded, that same bright smile still in tact. She went to walk to the door when Riku reached out and placed a hand on her arm. "You know… if you ever want… want to talk about… well anything… I'm here for you." She remarked quietly. It wasn't normal for them to be so… well so sisterly.

Risa's smile faltered if only for a moment before stuffing her pain back down inside her. "It's no big deal… Summer's here… it's time for fun, right!" She winked as though to drive her point home. "Besides… you can't take care of me forever." And with that she was out the door leaving a troubled Riku behind.

Meanwhile…

He brushed the back of his hand across his forehead and sighed as he placed the duffel bag beside his bed. Walking to the tall vertical blinds he pushed them aside and unlocked the balcony doors opening them with a slight push. He felt the warm sun encase him as he stepped out into the afternoon warmth. Letting his hands rest on the railing he looked out at the fantastical view… a whole summer with nothing but the beach, water, and endless time to do nothing… no stealing artifacts… no worrying about battling his alter ego's other half… just an entire summer of being himself. It had never felt so good and so terrifying.

Strange as it may seem he actually started to enjoy having Dark around… at least somewhat… it gave him a break from his life. All the worrying… all the heartache… the continuous questioning of what he should do about Risa… and the way she felt about him verses the way she felt about his alter ego…

"Niwa-kun!!!"

He felt his body slightly cringe at the sound of the female voice… it couldn't be… God wouldn't be that cruel… would He?

"M-Miho san?" Looking up he found that her balcony was directly above his.

"My sweet Niwa… it must be fate!" She squealed with delight that grated on his nerves. "I mean really… I don't believe in coincidences! The stars must be aligned and want us this close!" She remarked draping herself halfway over the railing. So far over that he feared that she might fall right over and on top of him. Perhaps that was her plan all along. The thought made him take a side step to the left.

Scratching the back of his head he chuckled nervously. "Yeah… or something…" He trailed off not sure how to answer her… not even sure he should answer her.

"So there's a bonfire tonight… I'll see you there! You should be at my door at 7:30… then we can go there together, okay!" Blowing him a kiss she was gone before he could respond.

"But… but wait! Boys aren't allowed on the… second floor." He finished to thin air.

Rolling his eyes he turned back to the openness of the beach before him and found that it wasn't as bright as he thought it was… Summer vacation had never seemed so cruel.


	4. What is this Feeling

Chapter Four: What is this Feeling?

That Night…

"So this is just a reminder that the sign-up sheet is in the back of the auditorium so be sure to put your name down with what talent you will be performing for Friday." Sensei Hiku instructed. Staring out at the many faces she smiled. It was their first night all together and she knew that most of her students couldn't wait to go out and explore the island. "So I know that you are anxious to enjoy yourselves so please act kindly and be responsible." With a wave she dismissed her students and watched them disperse into the sunset.

Riku sighed as she watched the boys go off and explore while the girls grouped together in their clicks and made their way down the beach. She had never been one to have a click, nor did she really want one. The option to always tag along with Risa had always been open not to mention convenient. She never realized how much she depended on her younger sister. Sticking close to her under the guise of 'watching out' for her had always left her with at least one person to be around so that she was never alone. Things however had changed.

Risa had taken refuge in their room since they had arrived. Keeping vigil at the window she had opted to skip out the pre-sunset meeting and instead decided to just hang back and watch the oncoming of night alone. It was unlike her… and it unnerved Riku to no end. How long could this last? Riku thought perhaps it was the initial shock of rejection that had thrown Risa into this mood but now… over a week later and still no change. What she had chalked up to sulking had now turned into a form of mourning… mourning of a broken heart… broken spirit.

'_Damn Dark Mousy… Damn him to the Heavens above!!!'_

So lost in her own thoughts that she didn't sense Niwa until he was right in front of her. "Ms. Harada?" His voice was soft, kind… always kind.

Her eyes popped open in shock. "Niwa-kun! Hi!" She greeted trying to keep the waiver from her voice.

He smiled, although it never quite reached his eyes as he squinted in the fading light. "I see that you made it here safely… you and the younger Ms. Harada?" He asked.

She nodded. "Hai! Risa is upstairs. She wasn't feeling well."

His facial expression grew solemn, almost guilty. "I see." He nodded. He looked away for a moment as though giving his next words serious thought before turning back to her. Scratching the back of his head in a somewhat nervous nature he opened his mouth to speak, shut it and then tried again. "Would you… would you take a walk with me, Ms. Harada?"

The request was so unexpected that for a moment she simply stared at him, this red haired boy with such pleasing eyes and found that a blush was steadily creeping into her cheeks. The ability to speak escaped her and instead she nodded. At her agreement he smiled widely and let a chuckle escape him.

Meanwhile…

Sitting in the bay window with her kneels pulled halfway to her chest she watched the sun sink into the ocean's horizon and felt her breath leave her with a sad sigh. Letting her chin come to rest on her knees she wondered what she was going to do. Things like this happened all the time… to all types of girls… boys too if she thought about it. Love wasn't always returned. So then why did she feel as though she would never heal? Why was she hiding high above the world? How long would she stay there?

How long? How long could she remain hidden in this room?

'_All week!' _Came her inner voice. It was the voice of a coward and she knew it.

Swallowing hard at the mere thought… the fact that the possibility was more appealing then she would like to admit she closed her eyes for a moment and for the first time found that his face wasn't there. His violet eyes weren't staring back at her… taunting her, calling to her. There was just empty space. With her eyes still closed she raised her hand pulling on the chord, drawing the blinds close with a definitive snap gulfing her in darkness. Bowing her head she felt the tears well up in her eyes once more… hopefully for the last time.

Meanwhile…

Miho smiled as she stared at her reflection in the mirror. Running a hand through her hair she looked at the clock on the far wall of her room. Watching the hands on the clock point to half past seven she looked to the door as though she expected nothing less from him then to be punctual. It was Niwa-kun… of course he would be… ten seconds passed and nothing… twenty… and then a full minute!!!

"Niwa-kun… where the heck are you?!" She bit out going to her balcony. Roughly pushing the sliding door back she stepped out into the oncoming night feeling the summer breeze on her exposed stomach. Wrapping her fingers tightly around the railing she leaned her body over with extreme ease and called out to him. "Niwa…" She stopped short as she noticed all the lights were off. She furrowed her brow in confusion. "Where are you Niwa-kun?"

Meanwhile…

They had been walking in silence for the last ten minutes… it had been the longest ten minutes of Riku's life; and although she was nervous, being this close to Niwa-kun, hearing the sound of his breathing, catching whiffs of his scent as the wind blew across the ocean, she felt something strangely like happiness. She wished that she could stay in this moment but the voice in the back of her mind wouldn't just let her be… there was a reason why she was here with him and she needed to know what it was… she had to know.

"Uh… Niwa-kun… you wanted to walk… for a reason right?"

He looked over at her for a moment as though just realizing that she was there. He smiled again… the same smile as before… the same smile that Risa had been giving her lately.

"I did, Ms. Harada… I wanted to talk with you… alone… in private if that be all right with you."

She nodded and felt her cheeks go hot as he reached out and took her hand. How thankful she was for the night. "What… about?" She asked.

His hand held hers, gave it a gentle but firm squeeze. "I need you…" He stated and she thought she would faint... Niwa needed her…

"Niwa-kun…" She breathed out.

"…I need you to tell me what to do so that I may help Risa."

And just like that her joy dissipated. "I… what?" She asked feeling his hand grip hers a little tighter. Looking down she felt her mind wander to how this situation could have been different. If his feelings were somehow changed towards her, how this may have played out. Coming to stare into his eyes she realized that would never be. He loved Risa. Daisuke loved Risa, had always loved her, would always love her. His eyes told her everything in that moment. There was pain, regret, guilt, all for her younger sister. There was so much emotion, the kind that never fades.

"You love Risa." She stated not meaning to voice her thoughts but finding that they were too big to keep inside.

His eyes opened wider if that were possible and he looked away as though somehow realizing how much he was revealing. "Her eyes have always been full of friendship but I cannot stop my emotions." He remarked with honesty.

She felt herself pulling her hand free. It just didn't seem right. The moment wasn't what she thought it was and now she felt out of place… wrong… it was all wrong somehow. Looking down at the sand she tried to concentrate on the grains between her toes… the way it sifted through her sandals and beneath the balls of her feet. "She… she's not the same as before… she has changed." She remarked.

He looked up sharply. "Because Dark broke her heart…"

She shook her head. "Not her heart… her spirit. He has changed the way she looks at the world. Risa has always had a soft demeanor… now her eyes have altered. They are different."

"Different how?" He asked.

She hesitated if only for a moment. "They are… they are like mine." She remarked waiting for him to say something… to ask more questions but he didn't. And that's when she knew that he understood. Somehow in the back of her mind… in the deep recesses of her heart she knew that he would. It was Niwa… he always understood.

Meanwhile… 

Wandering down the shoreline alone she made her way across the open space that was the beach. She had heard that there was some kind of gathering tonight but wasn't sure exactly where it was being held. She remembered hearing Rika mention something about a bonfire and if she ever wanted to 'come back to the world of the living' she should poke her head out of their room and join her. The words sounded harsh but were said with sisterly concern. Risa had learned a long time ago to tell the difference.

So far though she hadn't seen anyone and for the first she didn't feel so alone. It was an odd thing to miss that feeling, as though somehow she was set free and somehow she felt slightly abandoned by it. She had surrounded herself with people so that she could keep her loneliness at bay and now in this moment when there was absolutely no one around… as alone as she was she wasn't lonely.

Stopping in a random spot she looked up at the dark sky. Tiny lights twinkling in the open space above her and somehow nothing mattered… not Dark, not rejection… not even a broken heart… it all seemed somewhat trivial and she felt a small smile begin to make its way across her lips.

"Ms. Harada!!!" Her name carried over the sound of the crashing waves halting the smile that would have come. Looking over she felt her eyes widen in surprise.

"Miho-san?!" She asked noticing the girl's somewhat frazzled state. For a moment she felt herself wanting to flee if for no other reason then to just avoid the tidal wave that was Miho… and everyone knew that she was just that. But Risa didn't run. Instead she stood her ground, letting her hands clasp together behind her back… no more running… no more being a baby! She scolded herself silently watching as the slim girl's figure came into view better and better.

She raised an eyebrow at Miho's choice of attire. Although it was Summer, the night had brought about a much cooler temperature and with the ocean so close it created a nice chilly breeze that was much too frigid for what Miho was wearing.

"Have you seen my Niwa?" She asked breathlessly.

Risa stared for a moment not sure how to answer… 'Her Niwa?' She wasn't aware that Niwa-kun and Miho were together… had this occurred while she was wrapped up in everything that was Dark Mousy? Strange how she had become so wrapped up in her own love life that she blocked everything else out… had she always bee that way? So oblivious… so selfish?

Passing her open palm in front of her face Risa snapped back to attention and stared the girl in the face… she was pretty, her short hair was stylish, her clothes fashionable even if they were revealing. Confidence poured off of her in waves. She frowned slightly not knowing how she felt about Miho dating Niwa. Was she right for him? Did she really love him? Could she make him happy… happier then when he was with her?

She shook her slightly not liking that thought at all. Looking at Miho she gave the girl the same smile she had been giving to everyone. "We should find him together… perhaps he can show me where Riku is." She offered. This was the ladylike thing to do wasn't it; the proper thing to do… jealousy held no place in her life.

Miho eyed her for a moment before reaching out and looping her arm with Risa's exuberantly catching the brunette off-guard. "Sounds like an awesome idea to me!" She remarked with a wide grin already leading half dragging her down the shoreline. "You know Risa… you and I should be best friends!" She began not even waiting for her to respond as she continued.

Meanwhile…

They remained silent for moments on end neither knowing what to say. They continued to stare out at the night watching the waves wash up on shore and then slowly recede back into the ocean. Se sighed feeling his presence and yet not able to notice his distance. His mind seemed miles away. "Did she love him?" He asked softly.

Looking over at him she felt her mouth open to say something but realized that the words weren't there and closed them. Instead she nodded her reply affirmatively. She wished that she could tell him no… that it wasn't the case but in all honesty she knew that Risa in her own way did love Dark. Perhaps it wasn't like Niwa's love, all consuming and everlasting but it was love… her first love.

Placing his hands in his pockets he looked up at the starlit sky letting out a heavy breath. He could feel her eyes on him as if waiting for him to say something; to respond to her answer but what could he say? In all honestly he knew that Risa had loved Dark, perhaps she still did. Girls like Risa never had trouble opening their hearts… it was closing them that was the problem. She wasn't like him or others their age. She was always open about her emotions, never thwarted by the ramifications of rejection. It just wasn't in her nature to be guarded. It was a gift and a curse he believed. It was one of the many reasons why he loved her.

"Have you signed up for the 'Night of Stars' on Friday?" She asked after a long moment of silence that began to eat away her. She had never minded the quietness. She could stand with Risa for hours on their balcony and watch the sun set without so much as a whisper, but with Niwa it was different, she was different! She had long ago stopped fighting what she knew in her heart was true. She loved Niwa. She wasn't sure when it started but it had become too much to deny.

Looking over at her as if startled by her question he shook his head. "No, not yet, have you?" When she nodded affirmatively he smiled waiting for her to share.

"I thought about playing the piano… my mother taught us when we were younger." She stated somewhat shyly.

"You play?" He asked thoroughly interested.

She nodded. "Somewhat… Risa seemed better at it though but never took interest in it. It came naturally to her, perhaps her fingers are longer than mine." She remarked off-handedly looking down at her slender digits.

Without thought he reached out and grabbed her palm bringing it up to the moonlight to see it better. "Your fingers seem fine to me." He stated as though this was the most natural thing in the world not seeing her cheeks turn a deep red.

The scene could be interpreted quite differently from an outsider's perspective if someone should come along and like any good story there were two watching from further down the shoreline.

Risa saw them first. Watching as Daisuke lifted her sister's hand up into the light of the moon as though it were the most precious thing in the world. She wasn't sure what she should be feeling in that moment… happiness for her sister… relief that they were together instead of her having to look for Riku somewhere else… sadness at losing her very best friend… sadness for other reasons? She wasn't sure. She didn't have time to examine it because Miho also noticed in the next moment and called out.

"Niwa! Niwa-kun!" She waved enthusiastically… too enthusiastically. Her voice strained to keep the jealousy out of her tone as she began sprinting over to them both frozen for a moment in surprise.

Miho turned back to wave Risa to hurry but she found that her feet were stuck in the sand.

What was this feeling?


	5. Silly Girl

A Simple Kind of Life

Chapter Five: Silly Girl

It was odd. She felt out of place. There she was in the midst of many… some she always considered her friends. Chattering, laughing… it was all around her and for some reason she felt… she felt as if she didn't belong.

Risa stared at the many faces some blending with others in her minds eye through the haze of the flames licking at the night sky from the bonfire. She smiled politely as though thoroughly engaged in conversation but inside… inside there was turmoil… it was a feeling that she was unaccustomed to. Settings like these always made sense to her. So why now did she feel so different.

Clenching her hands into fists at her sides to hide her desperation to break free of this moment… to scream out in bewilderment at what was happening to her she drew in her bottom lip in a pensive manner that was so unlike her that the girl before her raised her brow in concern. "Risa-sama, are you alright? You seem…"

She stared at the redhead in front of her waiting for a response… a description to what this feeling was. "Ano… nani?" She asked.

There was a brief moment of silence as she struggled with what to say and finally backed down. "…uh nothing… it must have been a trick of the flame!"

She felt her hopes sink to the soles of her feet. A trick of the flame indeed… she needed a moment to herself. It was too soon. She wasn't ready to be out and about. So when someone said that more firewood was needed she jumped at the chance to go ignoring the odd looks from those around her. It was so unladylike to collect firewood, she might get a callous or worst chip a nail! Girls like her always had perfect hands but at the moment she didn't care.

Smiling she gave a thumbs up sign as she excused herself in a hurry disappearing into the night finding comfort in it. Listening to the waves break against the rocks she walked idly down the shoreline every now and then grabbing a stick that seemed dry enough.

She got about half way down the shore when she stopped for a moment staring out into the ocean. Watching its light bounce off the steady currents of water she brought the bundle of sticks to her chest almost as if trying to protect her heart from the continuous hammering. She felt her knees give out once again and felt them hit the sand, her bundle falling silently to the ground. Her hands came to rest in her lap as she felt the water blow through her, over her… into her. The taste of salt on her lips, her tongue… just like tears. But she wasn't crying. She wouldn't cry.

"You're not a baby Risa!" She scolded herself softly.

"Ms. Harada…"

The name caught her by surprise… a pleasant surprise. Looking up she felt a tentative smile come to her lips. His eyes fixated on her with such concern that guilt tugged at her heart. Why was he always the one? Why was he always there?

"Niwa-Kun…"

"Are you all right Ms. Harada?"

She nodded, giving him her best, brightest smile. "It seems that I was clumsy." She remarked looking over the fallen branches that were once in her arms. "I must have lost my footing."

He knew that she was lying. She was never good at it. "I'll get that." He was already kneeling beside her, cleaning up her mess. The mess she had made.

"You don't have to…" She began reaching out to stop him.

"It would be my pleasure." He stated as they reached for the same stick at the same time. Her hand covered his and he felt that familiar ache in his chest at the contact. The sudden rush of blood throughout his system making his entire body heat up. His heart sped up ten-fold and something inside his mind shut down all coherent speech. He went to pull back but her hand on his stopped him, forcing him to look up. Her head was bowed…hair falling across her face, her eyes fixated on her own hand holding his. Her fingers not quite moving on top of his but barely enough that he could feel it. "Ms. Harada… Risa-sama…" he felt her name leave his lips waiting for what she would do.

"I am a silly girl Niwa-Kun. I do not think before I act… I am too quick with my words… too easily influenced. I should not have… I should not have tried to catch a star. It was foolish of me." She whispered softly. "It is because of you… that night in the rain… you… I…I wanted to… it's just that… I wanted to say… arigato… Niwa-Kun." She stated making the words hold all the things that she could never say. "Arigato for… for everything."

He stared down at her downcast face and knew exactly what she was thanking him for. He swallowed hard wishing that she understood the meaning… the real meaning behind his actions. "You're welcome… that's what friends are for… right?" He stated with a smile so wide that it hurt him to the tips of his toes.

She looked up hearing the tone of his voice. The smile that he gave her… it made her feel… she wasn't sure. Before she could analyze it she saw the slight movement in the distance. Looking over his shoulder her eyes met Riku's. She swallowed hard looking back at him. He was still staring at her, still waiting on her.

Suddenly she felt guilty… so guilty for always demanding of him his attention, his time… She had never been fair to him. "I am… not a good friend to you am I?" She asked softly and saw his smile fall away. "I come to you all the time… I am selfish in my ways and you are too giving with me." She stated slowly removing her hand from his.

"Risa…"

"I am not a little girl… however silly I am. I must be stronger… Please forgive me Niwa-Kun." Taking a stand she reached out and grabbed the sticks from him. Squaring her shoulders, determined to do things differently she smiled at him, her first genuine smile in a long time even if it was tinged with sadness. "We will be better friends this time. I promise." She stated. "Will you let me?"

He stared at her for a moment seeing the change in her features and smiled in return. "Hai! I will, Risa-Sama… we will be better friends." He agreed feeling as though somehow this wouldn't be such a bad summer after all.


	6. A Night of Fallen Stars

A Simple Kind of Life

Chapter Six: The Night of Fallen Stars

She watched from backstage as Riku continued her solo on the piano. She smiled… truly smiled as she listened to the soft melody coming from the instrument. Closing her eyes she allowed herself to just breathe… in and out… to the very heart of her sister's playing. It was beautiful… she felt… she felt… like moving, swaying softly, almost imperceptibly as if her body wasn't her own. With her eyes closed she could see herself in the middle of nowhere, the soft wind blowing over her, through her… and he was there. He was holding her, guiding her, swaying right along with her. It was serene… it was the closest thing she had ever been to happy. Caught up in her own daydream, she opened her eyes and there he was…staring back at her with those eyes… those deep green eyes… and that fire red hair…

Wait! Dark didn't have green eyes! He didn't have red hair!

It was like a bolt of lightening as Daiskue's face appeared before her. Daiskue?!

"Daiskue?" She remarked opening her eyes suddenly.

"Miss Harada…"

Whirling around she stared at him, confusion etched upon her face. Taking a step closer he reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Are you alright?" He asked.

For a moment she couldn't speak… couldn't breathe. Looking down at his palm on her sleeved shoulder she swallowed hard. There were butterflies in the pit of her stomach… butterflies? Where did they come from? She opened her mouth to speak but found there were no words… simply no words at all.

"Risa!" The moment was gone… if there had ever been a moment.

Looking over her shoulder she met Riku's eyes and felt guilt wash over her again. "Riku… your performance was… it was truly amazing." She remarked truthfully staring at her sister but noticed that her eyes were focused on something else. Looking down she found that Daiskue's fingers were still wrapped around her forearm. She felt the blush coming to her cheeks and stepped away from him almost immediately.

"Yes, Miss Harada, your playing was beautiful."

It was the sound of his voice that brought her eyes to his and although she wanted to be unaffected by his compliment she wasn't. Her heartbeat sped up slightly and a smile came to her lips and all she could see was him and the fact that he liked her playing. He actually paid attention to her playing!

Risa felt oddly out of place standing between the two of them. Somehow she felt as if she were intruding upon a very private moment… a moment that seemed to be trying to exist for the longest time. It was the sound of her name being called that sent a jolt of presence to all three of them.

She smiled at the both of them. It was the same smile that she had been giving everyone Riku noticed instantly. "Wish me luck!" Risa winked at the two of them not waiting for the words to come from them. Feeling as though she had nothing to lose she walked out onto the stage and stared out at the audience. There was applause even before she opened her mouth. Students praising her just for being in their presence, it was strange how she never noticed before. They were looking right at her but none of them saw her. At least a hundred kids in the audience and not one of them was her friend. The realization brought tears to her eyes as the opening bars of her song floated across the auditorium. Fear grabbed a hold of her suddenly bringing forth a paralyzing effect that she had never before experienced. It was as if her whole life up to this moment had been a dream; her dream. And for the first time she had woken up and realized that nothing was how it should be. What was her life? What was her purpose? None of it made sense! Did anything ever make sense?

As she stared out at the countless faces staring at her, waiting on her she realized that they had no answers, they never did.

"Ms. Harada…"

It was the soft sound of his voice that whispered to her from the curtains that caught her attention. Looking over at him she felt the first few tears fall onto her cheeks and then she smiled… genuinely smiled.

He made sense… he always made sense.

"Are you alright Ms. Harada?" She heard him ask and found that she had no words so she nodded finding comfort in his eyes.

Turning back to those nameless faces she waited again for the music to begin and this time the words just came from her lips. Soft melodic words that conveyed all the things that she wasn't allowed to say flowed from within. Words of pain, loneliness, and heartbreak; things that someone like her wasn't expected to know about. But she did know… Perhaps deep down she had always known about this world that always seemed to exist right beyond her reach… right at her fingertips; Always brushing the very outskirts of her life.

Not acknowledging its presence did not mean she wasn't aware of the things that hurt. She had hurt. Dark was just the first time that she had allowed herself to feel it, openly and fully. But she would be okay. Inside she could feel that she would get through this.

And then the lights began to flicker… at first she thought perhaps it was her own eyes that were playing tricks on her but then the piano player faltered and then her words died away as she realized that something was coming… was there in their midst. She could feel it… they all could. Then there was silence… complete deafening silence that settled over them. And then there was darkness. It was sudden and set loose a chilling fear through the auditorium. It was everywhere all at once. She could hear nothing but the quiet breathing of the students in front of her. They seemed to be too afraid to move.

But she wasn't afraid. She simply waited. It was almost as if she knew it was coming for her. She could feel it as it tried to anticipate her movements but there weren't any to anticipate. She had nowhere to go… had nowhere to run. She wasn't even sure she wanted to. And then it was in front of her, cold air on her face, its eyes staring into her own even if she couldn't see them in the dark. She could feel them on her, trying to engage her fear but there was none there. Ever so slowly she felt her hand reach out, ready to touch the unknown. She was ready to fall into the darkness, to take the plunge and fall from the sky.

Suddenly there was a hand wrapping itself around her wrist pulling her back… pulling her away. The fingers warm on her flesh against the coldness before her suddenly becoming a barrier between her and the darkness. "Risa…" His voice was soft but encouraging.

"Niwa…" She breathed out. She stepped closer to him. Resting her cheek against the back of his shirt, she felt her hands reach around and hug him close to her. Her body pressed against him intimately she could hear the sound of his breathing and feel the rhythm of his heartbeat. Closing her eyes she listened as though it were the most melodic sound she had ever heard.

He was grateful for the dark as he felt the heat rise in his cheeks. Without his permission he felt one of his hands come to rest upon hers and felt their fingers intertwine over his wildly beating heart. He wasn't sure what she was thinking or what was happening. The need to protect her had simply come over him and then suddenly he was in front of her… and she was holding him.

And then the coldness had disappeared and the lights were back on. Students looking around beginning to lose the fear that had gripped them just moments before. Whispers of what had caused the blackout began to flow over the crowd but he barely noticed as he hadn't moved… they hadn't moved and he only wondered what kind of picture they made. Her body was still pressed to him from behind. Her cheek still resting on his back and her hands still wrapped tightly around him. They must have made quite a sight as students were beginning to stare.

"Risa-sama…" The word left his lips softly and floated over her.

Her eyes were closed tightly. To outsiders it must have looked as though she was gripped with fear but it was simply the opposite. In the midst of everything she had found comfort within his presence. She had found warmness and serenity and so she held onto it… brought it to her body in closeness and reveled in it until that last possible moment and then backed away and released him. The emptiness was there again full force and her heart slightly ached at the loss of contact. Looking up she met his green eyes and gave a small smile.

"Arigato… Niwa-Kun." She remarked. Staring at him for a long moment she brought her hands to her chest and clasped them tightly as though trying to keep her heart from leaping out from within. And then she turned and walked away never looking back. She had been so close to letting go… she had felt the darkness that lingered just a breath away and was ready to fall but he had stepped between her and the edge. Once again Niwa had been there to save her and she had grasped onto him without hesitation. This was not the way to be a better friend… this was not the way to let him go and so she had released him. She had almost fallen from the sky but he had been there to catch her… perhaps this star would remain in the sky for another day…


	7. Curiosity

A Simple Kind of Life

Chapter Seven: Curiosity

She made her way back to her room in silence. She never even bothered to look at Riku, but she could feel her sister's eyes on her… watching her. Once alone she leaned her body into the closed door not sure what had come over her. What had possessed her to reach out for him, to hold him, to find comfort in him? He had just been there, coming between her and the last barrier that separated her from the darkness… that's what she kept telling herself. He was like a flame and she like the moth. It was only natural for her to gravitate towards him, to reach for him and hold on. Wasn't it?

Then why hadn't the ache gone away? Why were there still light flutterings of butterfly wings within her stomach? Looking down, she frowned at the sensation, as though her glare would make them stop. Pushing off the door she crossed the room and came to the double doors leading out to the balcony. Grasping the handles she flung the doors apart and felt the wind rush over her. The gusts of air sweeping through her long brown tendrils and over her pale face she stepped out onto the balcony. Her eyes scanned the night sky lazily as though searching for something… anything. Letting her arms rest on the railing she sighed not sure what had happened tonight and not sure she ever would.

The thought of Niwa that way had never once crossed her mind until tonight… the way he had stepped in front of her to protect her from something she was so drawn to… it had been so heroic and yet so simple and it had touched her heart deeply. He had been willing to face the unknown for her… to stand up to the darkness that most certainly would have torn him to shreds… for her. And she had loved it… she had embraced the feeling of safety… she had embraced him.

She had embraced the weakness that always dwelled within her and allowed Niwa to be her strength. She had once again hid behind someone else. The difference this time is that it hadn't been out of fear but mere comfort. She relished in him and the comforting aura that he brought with him. It had been serene against the turbulent waters inside her. He had been the calm to her storm and for just a moment she had reached out and held onto it. The sensations that coursed through her had been odd. She wouldn't call them affection. It was almost like a sense of protectiveness…ownership even. It was as though he belonged to her. But he didn't… He never had and he never would.

And it wasn't fair of her… it hadn't been right. She could see the way Riku's eyes lit up at the sight of Niwa and she had no right to impose on her sister's growing affections. It had been selfish of her and completely wrong. Just because her life had become upturned right before her eyes, making her question everything about herself, it did not give her the right to hold on to someone else's dream. And she could see that that is exactly what Niwa had become for Riku. She would not sabotage that in any way.

Allowing her chin to rest into her upturned palms she sighed softly trying to block out the feel of warmness that had come over her when he wrapped his hand around her wrist. She tried to ignore the still lingering scent of him that she had inhaled when she laid her cheek against him.

She shook her head, standing a little straighter. She would not allow herself to be that girl. Besides she was still nursing a broken heart… the heart that Dark had shattered. There was no room for anything or anyone else… was there?

The slight glare in the distance caught her attention. It was a flash of light coming from one of the caverns in the mountainside across the way. Something bright reflecting the light of the full moon shining directly onto her balcony seemed to be calling to her… beckoning her. Leaning closer she squinted her eyes, trying desperately to see what was out there but it was too far away. Running back to her room she rummaged through her sister's duffle bag finding the object she had been looking for.

Coming back out she raised the binoculars to her eyes and tried to get a better look… the brightness practically blinding her… flickering on and off as though there was someone or something moving across its source of light and suddenly she was reaching for the door, the binoculars thrown over her shoulder and her jacket tucked under her arm not realizing how this innocent inquiry… this simple journey would be the last one she would ever take.


End file.
